Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
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