Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(443): View more from Maryland

a queef is a wish your heart makes.

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

Did we use protection last night?

(1-780): View more from Alberta, CA

Um, no...keep in touch, okay?

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(502): View more from Kentucky

You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.

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(847): View more from Illinois

I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.

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(301): View more from Maryland

Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job

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(216): View more from Ohio

Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.

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(206): View more from Washington

college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars

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(218): View more from Minnesota

You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.

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(612): View more from Minnesota

not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class

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