Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
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