Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
You broke a cabinet. You were climbing up it and it collapsed on you. Lines were crossed.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
