What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize