i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
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