There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i think i have herpe
just one?
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
Apparently I told him he would be good for human sacrifice.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize