im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
zippers are such a cool invention
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
It got awkward when the girl working at planned parenthood continued to hit on me, after she knew about my STDs.
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
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