You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
...he tried to burn down someone's house once. ABORT ABORT ABORT
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize
