Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize