Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Nothin much, just sipping warm franzia from a plastic valentines wine glass while wrapped in my Mexican blanket listening to sappy country songs and mourning my lack of a love life. Hbu?
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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