worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
It was drunk tag. I was Alice in wonderland chasing a ballerina who was chasing Lance Armstrong who had needles in his arms.
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
I'm gonna face reality, tomorrow morning is not on my hungover agenda.
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I'm gonna have to start putting baby wipes and a change of pants in my bag. The amount of times I'm scared of shitting my pants in public is too high and I need the reassurance
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