If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I forgot how ruthlessly advertising works on me when I'm high.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
