i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
