I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
Fireball goes down like mother's milk. Btw your housemate is naked
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
