i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
Randomize
