Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
You're lucky I'm tired or I'd take a pic of me mounting a reindeer yard decoration
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
