if i can run in heels then i can drive
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
The shower rod just came down while I was pooping. I caught it though and the curtain stayed on, so I'm not sure if it's a good or bad omen for the rest of my day
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