We should be called the Road Head Warriors
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
currently hungover, lying in bed and cutting cheese with my drivers license. ashamed? not even a little bit.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
Randomize