I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
