Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
I found an HIV test/information brochure on the kitchen table and what i can only assume to be an "I'm sorry you might have AIDS" gift bag, complete with a candle and popcorn, and I haven't seen you in 36 hours. You good?
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Drunk is a universal language darling
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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