when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
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