found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
This is my punishment for trynna have a festive time with a stranger. I always forget you can't get weird with one night stands
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
Well, he hasn't actually seen me naked. Just my boobs... and the left side of my vagina.
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Randomize
