i dont even know how to be here
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
His dick is hereby named Charles Dickens. Will's is less cerebral. I'd like to call it Pinnacle like the vodka we drank when we hooked up, but I feel like that's a compliment it doesn't deserve.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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