did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Due to our sore throats we are now doing bong hits with cranberry juice to sooth it.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
He came up to me looked at my tits said they were huge, rated them a 7 and then asked if girls really do masterbate. To make it better, he put his hand up to my face and said his penis is longer than my face...
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
I'm at this party and a blind kid just walked in and asked "where is the fucking pong table"
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
