First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
He woke up, yelled "RALLY!" and then puked in my glove compartment
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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