but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
The fact that I am sitting home writing a resume while you're out inducing vomiting makes me feel like way more of an adult than I'm ready to be.
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
I swear I have some evil slut demon in me when I'm blacked out
Don't we all.
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