Me too!
the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Are there any plans to where i might need to be dressed semi-nicely or is it a "pants optional" weekend?
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
Randomize
