Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I woke up on the floor with 2 cartons of cigarettes, a box of chocolate bars, and a business card for a man named Larry. Don't remember him, but if the Rols on his card is his, I might throw him a mouth party...
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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