have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
Randomize
