look no pants
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
He told me they were just razor bumps!
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
This dude has my number from April last year. Drunk me left sober me a puzzle. No confirmation of pants off business
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
and here comes the time of my day when I haw to convince a guy to drive my cape and my handle to my dorm.
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
