I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
The realization of how permanent those tattoos really were set in this morning... I am SO sorry.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
Randomize
