You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
