I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
swear to god, just saw some chick dressed in a full chicken costume buying eggs and telling the cashier that she "just wants her babies back."
buy whatever she's on. a lot of it.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
