Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
Every perfect package comes with a warning label.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
