If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
One little Beyonce reference and he turns on me faster than liberals on Jon Mackey
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
My bed smells like the plague
Theres about 23 grilled cheese sandwiches stuck to my ceiling and tomato soup all over the kitchen. You are never allowed over again. Ever.
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