Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I am mentally ready for anal.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
