I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
Pregnant stripper...not hot.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
I have had more skin than food in my mouth the last three days
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
I dropped my pants and she just stared until she asked how is that even possible? Best night ever lmao
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