am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
He doesn't know I'm infertile yet, that's when the sex gets good
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
We invented "Diesel Bombs." They're supposed to be a bomb, but they come in a 20+ oz. glass and have a blackout record of 6 wins and 0 losses. Undoubtedly going to be the next Muhammed Ali of the drinking world.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
