I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
Also I think I realized when my life started to turn into shambles.. The day I took my high school senior picture WITH A HICKEY ON MY NECK
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Randomize
