Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
stop changing my ringtone to people fucking, it looks bad at work
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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