I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
my penis says it needs to be in something. my phonebook says its you
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
Wedding cake is always the best dance partner. In the corner. With a jack and coke. And while I'm crying. Listening to "Almost Paradise".
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
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