You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Ah why did you tell everyone you dragged your sac across my face!
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
her sex was completely horrible but her weed was great. imma ask her out again
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I wish I saved his nudes so I could anonymously submit them to his tumblr
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I've had more sex since the twins moved in than I'd had in the previous four years. They are the best wingman ever.
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
