It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Cooked. Eating pizza. Didn't have a napkin so I took my shirt off and I'm using it.
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
Randomize