Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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