Please dont use Danity Kane lyrics to describe your emotions.
this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
just gave another girl i passed on the walk of shame a high five
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
some guy i've known for a week sent me nudes saying "you're welcome" i need an award for this birthday
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize
