i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
11:30pm - Shots together. 12:15pm Shots together. 12:45pm Shots together. 9:30am Plan B's together.
Randomize
