Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
The most interesting things happen to you when your pants come down. I truly envy you.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
