yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I spent 10 minutes contemplating condensation on grapes this morning.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
Randomize
