He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
My roommate is either deadlifting a bus or having sex. I can't tell which
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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