Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I FEEL LIKE I CAN TAKE DOWN A FULLY GROWN MOUNTAIN LION WITH ONLY A POINTY STICK OH MY GOD
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
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